I’ve gotten hung up lately on change.
The title of Seth’s post that got me to New York included the phrase “change your life”. What’s tripping me up now (actually has for two months) is what that actually means.
I think I came here with the expectation that it meant changing me. That what was wrong with my career, my life was something with me. Which is true in a sense in that I am not clear about my purpose, I undervalue my contributions and I focus on doing over imagining. All of which does have to change if I want to change my life.
What I thought needed to change was getting more education, learning, knowledge around certain things, which would then cause people to value me more and give me some idea of what I wanted to be when I grew up.
But what I’m stuck on right now is thinking that changing my life means changing me. As in changing the person I am – a doer. Is it a necessary component of change that I change from doer to visionary? Or does change mean embracing who I am and being better about selecting situations where I can be that at my best?
If I manage the second type of change, I can see where that would change so much for me. To be in situations that allow me to shine, to receive my due, to make a difference. Does that change my life? You bet.
But there is the nagging in the back of my head that still says that changing my life means changing me. As though I, in and of myself, would never be able to shine, be valued or make a difference as I am.
So what truly constitutes change for me?